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The Montauk Superman

Part 3 <-- | -->

The Big Lab

After that I was not the same person, and they began taking me to a lab. Two men in overcoats would knock on my door, I or Brian would open it, they would say two or three words, I would drop what ever I was doing, get my coat and go with them. I had no say, I had no control. That was it I just did it, I don't know why, it was just like when I pulled the car over for Mr. Purrizzo. They had a car outside, I would get in the back and just sit there with a blank stare in my eyes. The lab was, I would estimate, from 30 to 90 minutes away. I say this because the first few trips I remember the trip. I remember getting on a divided two lane highway, it had to have been the New York state thruway (the only divided highway around) and we road for a while. I remember them asking me if I knew where I was, asking me if I knew what time it was, was it night or day, and with a big smile I said "of course I know where I am" as I was proud for out smarting them by remembering landmarks and remembering where we were going and how we got there. After that I remember the men in the car "doubling back" one exit on the thruway, and when we arrived the man with the white hair and black leather coat would ask me again "do you know where you are" and again I would tell them exactly what they wanted to know. After that I don't remember any more "rides". I remember getting in the car in front of the dorm, and then I remember getting out of the car in front of the lab (the facility). I think they finally got smart and programmed my mind somehow so that when they said the word "sleep" or some similar command, I would instantly lay on the seat and would be out like a light until they decided to re-awake me, because after that there was no more "ride" only getting in of the car and getting out of the car.

At the big lab is where the torture continued but the more sophisticated experiments took place. The head of the project was Adolph. He was no ordinary agent or CIA man, he is a Nazi. Him and his partisans just had the "look" of some Nazi genetic experiment. The psychotic eyes, the "Arian" face and features such as the straight blond hair. After I had killed two of his "boys" in the small lab with the baseball bat he kept trying to tell me that he was my "father", and he seemed obsessed with this idea. He had similar abilities of his own, but I was more powerful. I know this because the first few times I tangled with him he threw me, but once I figured out how he was simply misdirecting my force into another direction, I then could take him. He knew this and after I threw him a few times he no longer would try and step in and stop me if I got loose, he would let all of the "hired hands" try and stop me. He was the one who in my mind could stop me, somehow he implanted in my mind that I could not harm him. I didn't fear him, I would just avoid him if I was making an escape. As in my mind he was the most powerful one out of the group. He was also the one who did all of the "coaching" or "directing" if you will. None of the other guys really said much to me. They mostly talked off to the side amongst themselves, and when called upon to help out they never said a word unless it was to answer a question asked by Adolph, never a word directly to me. Remember, at this point they had already had TOTAL control over me, and I mean TOTAL control. They tell me to get in the car, I get in the car. They tell me to stand over there, I go and stand over there. They tell me to stand in the corner, and I was like a "robot" I would go stand in the corner, once there I stood like a statue until spoken to again.

There always seemed to be a guy with a video recorder, recording everything, and I mean everything. Even in the chase across campus when the girl died, one of the men had a camera on his shoulder. I only got a glimpse of it but it was no VHS recorder from SEARS. It was one of those bigger cameras with a light on top that the news crews use, only it was a quite a bit smaller but the same style. So at the small lab as well as the big lab, they were recording everything I did. From how I stood to how I sat to how I stripped down to my underwear. The camera was always watching me.

To start the tests were simple at the big lab. They would tell me to do "push ups," and I would start doing push ups. The thing is I would do push ups until they told me to stop. When I was "myself" (not under hypnosis or their "mind control") I already could do more push ups than probably 99% of the population. 150 maybe 200 without stopping (with perfect form), don't forget I was invited to be on, or "tryout" if you will for the U.S. Power lifting team, and I'm in the best shape of my life.

But when under hypnosis they would tell me to start, and then start playing cards on a fold out card table. I have no idea how long I would do them for but it was a while (1/2 hour, an hour I don't know). I wouldn't think I would just do.

The focus of the initial research, I believe, was to try and unlock the secrets of the mind. How to make the perfect soldier, to make a "super human killing machine". They were finding out how, when under hypnosis, can the mind over come the physical limitations of the human body. How, when under hypnosis, can the mind overcome the physical impossibilities of going against the laws of physics? How, when under hypnosis, can the mind overrule the build up of lactate acid which occurs in the blood stream when muscle contraction occurs? How can the mind allow the body to do things which would normally be physically impossible?

To be able to do push ups for the length of time and the number of repetitions that I did them for would be a physical impossibility. Yet there I am doing it. How could I do it? Because of the way my mind "thinks" if you will, is different from everyone else. Somehow if you tell me to do something on the subconscious level I truly believe that I can do it. So how did I do it, UNDER HYPNOSIS, THEY TOLD ME I COULD DO IT! AND I TRULY BELIEVED THEM!!!

They did all sorts of similar tests on me. I remember next they bring in a squat rack and barbell set. They put a bunch of weight on and tell me that these are "fake plates" and that the bar is as "light as a feather". It's just like doing deep knee bends with no weight at all, and then instructed me to starting squatting. I would then begin exercising until they told me to stop. It was very strange because I could hear the "clang" the weight plates make when you have four or five stacked on each side and you are squatting. In testing at Rochester I squatted 545 pounds as my maximum, when I was squatting in the lab I think I was doing seven 45 pound plates on each side (which is 675 pounds for as many reps as they wanted). I would just start "squatting" and I would not stop until they told me to. Yet it felt like there was no weight pressing on my shoulders at all. It was in reality "as light as a feather", just like doing simple deep knee bends.

Another favorite was to sit me down in a chair and tell me to envision my arm not as an arm but as a huge robotic hydraulic vice. This vice had unlimited power, and ANYTHING they placed in my hand I could crush, just like squeezing an "egg." They then would proceed to place various objects in my hand, and I would crush it like a egg. In my mind I wasn't squeezing an unopened can of Coke. I was squeezing an egg, and I would crush it accordingly. I remember they put some kind of gauge in my hand to see what the pounds per square inch was that I was producing. It was like one of those old hand exercisers you would squeeze. The first time I squeezed it, I broke it, and they got all excited. They had to "recalibrate" another one for me, and again I buried the needle on their gauge, and this astounded them. They made me feel "good" about being able to do these things, and I was sort of "proud" of my self. As my confidence grew, my abilities grew. It was all like a game to me. They would set up some kind of test, something that I should not be able to do, and I would live to prove them wrong.

They told me to walk around with my chest stuck out and head held high because I was "the biggest, badest, meanest motherf*ckering stud on the planet and if you F*CK with me I will kill you." This particular suggestion caused some very serious problems later on.

They said we need a name to call you by. This name is something very special, it is the name that ONLY WE may call you by, it is your code name and you should spend some time thinking about it because it is very important. I answered almost immediately "I want to be called THE RHINO" I said. I had chosen this name because it was a name I wanted as my "nickname" on my high school football team. However in high school the nickname was already given to another player so I could not have it, but for some reason I always thought it was really "COOL", and now that I could choose any name I wanted, I chose "the Rhino" and that's why I chose "the rhino" as my new name. At first the man with the white hair and black leather coat as well as the other guys laughed at the name, but after a while it grew on them and they liked it. The man with the white hair and black leather coat would bark out "RHINO" get over here, and it would come running like a puppy and then he really started to like it.

I think they made me choose a different name not only for the practicality of it, but more so to disassociate my "new self" from my "old self." In other words, when they called me they didn't want any association to do with my "old self", anything to do with "Andy". Mostly because they never broke "Andy", since they could not break "Andy" they sort of had to build over him. They squashed "Andy" into a vacuum sealed steel coffin and buried him under tons and tons of ten foot thick steel plates the each the size of a football field, and buried him in the deepest part of my mind. They wanted "Andy" to be totally gone, but I remember they could NEVER destroy or break him. I think that is why I still remember all of these events. That fact really angered the man with the white hair, and really frightened Mr. Green as his worst fear is that I will remember and come back for him. And believe me he WILL see his day in court, for honestly I have no fear of dying anymore because I have touched what is beyond this life and despite all of this I still somehow have an "inner peace" if you will. A fact that I am no longer afraid of the darkness and afraid of the night. But anyway, when they called me they wanted "THE RHINO".

They wanted me to think ONLY as "the Rhino". They wanted the biggest, badest, meanest motherf*ckering stud on the planet, and if you F*CK with me I will kill you "RHINO."

What I didn't know at the time was that my father, when he was in the Navy, was part of an elite ultra top secret nuclear explosion test that he was hand picked for. The name he chose was also "the Rhino". This must have proved very interesting to them. At this point I discover that they had been taking me from the age of 2 years old. As I was from the very beginning part of a HUGE genetic manipulation project along with my father and along with most of the armed forces in the United States which has been going on sense the 1960's. More about this later.

As the conditioning continued they were particularly interested in "the jump." I remember discussing it with them. They asked me how did I do it? I answered "I don't know, but when I jumped I had no fear, as I was falling I was like a cat, calm and cool, again no fear, focusing like a laser only on the landing, before the impact the 'steel springs'." As a result of this, of course, they start having me "jump" off of things. As you can imagine it, what they did to me was not pleasant. When you jump you are a cat, they told me. You will always land on your feet and you will always be OK no matter how high. You will have no fear. Every jump in your mind is as easy and as safe as jumping off a footstool. When you land, your legs become steel springs and will absorb all impact. The size and strength of the steel springs will automatically adjust to the height of the jump for you. There is no pain, and you have no fear!

They started me off with small jumps to begin with (off a six foot step ladder). I remember this because they wanted me to stand on the fold out tray that clearly says "this is not a step" and I didn't want to because it clearly said "this is not a step" so I ended up going to the top step (it was no big deal in terms of height, but it was in my mind a big deal in terms of things you should do and things you should not do). So I specifically remember that. Next it was up a ladder to a platform they had in the "Big Lab", maybe 25-30 feet. Then it was off the side of the big lab outside (the top of the building). We would then progress to jump off objects that were higher and higher.

What they would do is bring me to a certain spot (whether it was a bridge or a cliff) and simply say "Jump", we will meet you at the bottom. And I would simply say "OK" walk to the railing and jump over. I wouldn't look first and then back up and then jump. I would just, jump, RIGHT OVER. I would land like a cat, bounce in the air from the release of the stored energy in the compacted steel springs that were my legs, do a shoulder roll as I landed the second time from the "bounce", stand up, and wait for them. It was just like jumping off a footstool and it was just as easy.

The next day or so, I would find my self wandering back to the same spot during school hours, what ever it was (a bridge, a cliff, what ever) and as I retraced my steps, when I got to the jumping point I would look over the edge AND MY HEART WOULD DROP INTO MY STOMACH. I remember saying to myself "this is wrong, it was not this high" because to me the night before the jump was nothing "like a footstool" now I'm looking at it and saying "NO F*CKING WAY IS THIS RIGHT, NO F*CKING WAY". These things are not physically possible. I became very scared, and I became even more confused.

I remember one night walking through this chain link gate, and I began climbing up this white ladder with a round cage all around it. I'm climbing and I'm climbing, it seemed to go on for ever. I reach some kind of a platform which is made of some kind of metal grating. There is a man standing there and he tells me to climb further, until I reached the next platform. I did notice he was wearing a safety harness and was clipped on to the structure with a rope. I had no fear at all about where I was or what I was doing. The ladder had changed to a 4 inch pole with the rungs now welded on the outside. Like a ladder you would see at the circus. When I reach the top, the platform is only about 3 feet by 4 feet. I remember all of a sudden being almost blinded by red, and then it would go away, red and it would go away. So I turn my back to it. I look down and the man on the lower platform yells to me to jump. I simply jumped off without fear and with out hesitation. I remember freezing like a cat in the air for a split second, and then hitting the ground. I hit the ground fairly hard and my ankle felt a slight twinge of pain, as I bounced I ALWAYS kept my eyes focused on the ground, on the exact spot of landing. I did my shoulder roll, and stood up, my ankle hurt some what but I was fine. This did not seem like jumping off a footstool, it was more like jumping off a six foot ladder. Still no problem at all, I walked off the pain in my foot and didn't think twice about it. I walked over to the group by the car and just stood there. There were three or four dark figures talking amongst themselves. They were in a group and off to the side of the car, it was dark and all I remember is there shadows.

I watched as a small black figure was climbing down the structure. He looked like an ant on your kitchen wall. He gets to the bottom, takes off his gear and starts running over to us. He is all excited. It's Adolph. He is screaming with excitement and he runs up to me and hugs me and pats me on the back as he talks to the figures behind me. I remember standing there and saying to myself "are these guys idiot's, or just f*cking retarded. What is the big f*cking deal about jumping off a dam small ladder like that! And why the HELL am I out here in the middle of the night to do this stupid shit anyway!" I didn't understand any of it but I remember being very annoyed at them for wasting my time with such simple tasks.

The next morning I woke up and I remembered this strange dream I had. I remember climbing and climbing a white ladder. Like I was on the Eiffel tower, and the gate. When I reached the top I looked for a second at the magnificent view, and then I was on the ground again. This dream was really weird because most dreams you remember for about 10 minutes or so, but I was thinking about this ALL day for some reason. As the day goes by I peace together that this is happening in Rochester, and I think I remember land marks like the 7-11 and I think I know how to get there. Finally after dinner I decided to get in my jeep and try and "feel" my way to this place. Without any mistakes I turn right here, drive for a while and turn left there. I find myself turning onto this grass field and a dirt path. I drive to the tree line and there is a chain link fence so I must stop. I leave my headlights on and walk to the fence. I'm standing in front of the "gate" in my dreams. I see something beyond it and as I focus there is a field, and in the middle of it is a bunch of lights and some type of structure behind it. I cannot make it out clearly because of the shadows from the lights. So I stoop down to one knee and look up. I could barley see because the trees were overhanging my view. It was a huge microwave radio tower. This didn't make any sense, so I put my face so it was almost touching the ground and I looked up and saw the red flashing light ALL THE WAY AT THE TOP. When I saw the red flashing light my head instantly started to spin and I threw up several times right there. I don't know how long I was there, but I remember driving home and I was profusely sweating. Like sweating after you throw up from a hang over. I finally get home, and like my mother Brian is asking me where I've been. So I tell him the story about the dream and for some reason he seem very annoyed about this, but I don't know why. I go to bed still sweating and shaking. The next morning I remember waking up and feeling absolutely terrific.

This event must have occurred soon AFTER thanksgiving of 1988, because during the thanksgiving break freshman year is when I bought the 1979-three speed jeep CJ-5, and then took it up to school. The thing is after I told Brian where I had been they placed a tracking device under the rear wheel well of my jeep on the passenger side (inside the fender on the rear wheel passenger side). I remember this because I was going to my jeep one evening and I noticed a big rock stuck in my tire and I tried to pry it out but I couldn't so I went and got my tire iron to pry it loose from the deep tread (that's the kind of guy I am, if I see something wrong on my car I can't just leave it because it would bother me until I knew it wasn't there). So anyway I pry it out of the deep tread (they were brand new 33 x 12.5 x 15 flotation tires with new tread) and as I pry it out the tire iron and the rock fly up into the wheel well and the rock, the tire iron and this little black magnetic box come out. It was the same size and shape of one of those "Hide a key" boxes, as a matter of fact that's what I thought it was. But it wouldn't open, it was just a box with a magnet and a wire sticking out of it. At that instant I became scared because I didn't exactly know what it was but from somewhere inside me I had my suspicions (since I never put it there). I had parked right next to the bus stop, and as I am holding this little black box a bus pulls up and is going to let some people out, so I said to my self "why the f*ck not" so I ran over to the bus and stuck this little black box under the wheel well of the bus and it pulled away. And with in minutes I had forgotten all about it.

We were having a party at my fraternity that night and as a pledge with a car the brothers of the house had sent me out for cigarettes before the party started. I went out and got the cigarettes and had to park in a different spot when I came back because mine was taken. I got extremely drunk at the party and ended up crashing on one of the many couches in one of the rooms at the fraternity house for a while. So they didn't know where I was. They being a branch of the Nazi underground who is using the University of Rochester, Kodak, and Bausch and Lomb, (to name a very few) as covers for their genetic and mind control programs in order to manipulate the children of America.

"They" thought is was making a "run for it" as the bus was driving all around Rochester, and I didn't come home that night. When I got back to my room at about 5:00 in the afternoon Brian is there, pissed off as hell at me asking me "Where the f*ck have you been?... What did you do last night?" I tell him to go "F*ck himself" and I head for the shower and then I am going to take a long nap. When I get back from the shower, Brian is gone but the man with the white hair "Adolph" is in my room along with Mr. Green and about four other guys. They slam the door shut as soon as I walk in, when I realize they are in my room I try to run, but Adolph says a few words and I cannot move. I stand there like I am in a trance just like I do when I am back at the lab. He starts to chew my ass out, and all I could do is stand there and smile. I guess they had spent the whole night following the bus around, then they finally stopped it and searched it and found that I wasn't on the bus and then they found the tracking device in the wheel well and then couldn't find me, and I didn't come home. They were very pissed off at me. I just stood there and smiled. It was one of the proudest moments of my life! They told me to get in the god d*mn bed and to go to f*cking sleep. So I put a big chew of tobacco in my mouth and played Nintendo for a few hours, before finally going to bed. This is an example of how even though I was totally under their control, they could not totally destroy "Andy" and somehow I found a way to come out. Then even though they had instructed me to go to bed I some how fought the order off and went to bed when I wanted to.

At some point came the "big jump" (as if jumping off the huge tower wasn't big enough). I don't remember exactly when it was, but I clearly remember the event. All along, the main point of spending so much time on all of these jumps was to see if I could make the "big jump" and survive. The theory behind all of this was that once the body reaches a certain speed (32feet sec/sec) you cannot go any faster, you have reached maximum velocity. So, in theory if I could jump off an object and reach 32 feet sec/sec and some how survive, then it didn't matter how high I was jumping from. In other words if I jumped off the tower (a jump of a few hundred feet) and I reached maximum velocity then I could also jump from 500 feet, 1000 feet, or 10,000 feet. It didn't matter how high because I couldn't go any faster. Imagine the potential of a soldier or covert operations team who could jump out of a plane and didn't need parachutes. Think about it! A low flying plane going over a strategic target, the enemy would probably dismiss it as a reconnaissance plane. The team could literately fall from the sky and land practically right on top of the target and no one would know anything about it until months after it was over. This is what they are after, the ultimate solider, the ultimate killing machine.

I don't remember anything about how I got there, but I remember sitting in a small single engine propeller plane (like a sky diving plane), I remember earlier having received instructions on how to form the "arch" during "free fall" but that's about it. They had me in some kind of belt apparatus in a hanger of a sky diving school showing me the position. Back in the plane the guy tells me to come over to the door and to put my foot out on the wheel. I remember yelling at him "I DON'T HAVE MY PARACHUTE!" He then yells in my ear "STAY HERE I'LL GO GET IT." I am standing at the open door with both of my hands firmly grasping the sides of the plane, I look back to see what the man is doing. He is up by the pilot on the radio.

He starts to walk back to me and he grabs a parachute from beneath a bungi spider web that is sticking to the side of the plane. The parachute is two big squares attached to each other by two seat belt like straps and then there are many other straps, clips and hooks coming off the two straps as well as the two squares. I see him coming toward me and he goes to say something in my ear. I lean back to listen. He says to me "LET GO OF THE PLANE, WE HAVE TO PUT YOUR PARACHUTE ON." The second I let go of the plane he pushes me out. I am all disoriented for a few seconds but then get my self into the "arch". I remember I had no fear as I was falling, I was not afraid. I remember focusing on the ground, focusing, focusing, focusing, and got prepared for the impact both mentally and physically. As the ground came closer I envisioned my legs as "steel springs", and got my body ready. Knees bent, tighten the butt and thighs, always, always, always keep the knees slightly bent. It was like a feeling of doing a reverse squat if you will, the only difference being that instead of having the weight already on your shoulders and then exploding upwards, you are simple mentally prepared as the weight becomes your own body weight multiplied times the acceleration rate you are traveling. I remember hitting the ground with such force I cannot really explain the feeling, it was just like "BA-BOOM". I hit so hard that afterwards they told me that I must have "bounced" at least 50 feet in the air. This makes sense because I had no fear during the whole thing but I became scared the second after I hit the ground when I saw how high I was still in the air. I simply had never "bounced" that high before. Then I hit and "bounced" for the second time (I had bounced so high the first time that I could not do my shoulder roll for the landing, I had to "bounce" again and then do the shoulder roll) and on the second "bounce" I was disoriented because I never had "bounced" twice before and I twisted my knee on the landing. I remember it was day time it was cold and I had landed in a field. I was lost in the tall grass. I said to my self "GET UP! GET UP YOU SON OF A BITCH." And I managed to stand up and I saw men running towards me, I tried to walk but I collapsed right there. They come over to me and Mr. Green starts yelling at me "STAND UP! GET UP! I SAID STAND UP!" I yell back at him "I'M TRYING" and as hard as I tried I could not get my legs under me. Some of the men pulled me to my feet and tried to help me walk, but the whole experience had left me totally exhausted. I mean I felt like I was drained of every ounce of strength that I could possible gather together. I begged them telling them "I'm all right, just please let me rest for a minute."

Finally they laid me down in the field and I passed out. I don't know how long I was out for but they had to wake me up because it was getting to be dusk. I could walk now but only with help, they put me in the back seat and I fell right to sleep. I woke up in front of the dorm again and they helped me to my room and then put me to bed. I don't remember how long I was asleep for but it was for a long while.

The Funding

Then came a night I will not soon forget. It was the same situation as when they threw me out of the plane. Only this time it was dusk. I remember a man throwing me out of the plane. I am falling, I don't know where I am, I can't see the ground. Everything goes black. I flash into "my room" in my mind I am hurt very badly. My legs are not working, I cannot make it into the pool. It is hard to breath. Some how I manage to pull my self into the pool. I am hurt very badly. I reach for the "super top secret green formula" which is duck tapped to the poster board. If I break it the healing pool will become one hundred million times more powerful then it already is. I grab it with almost my last breath and break it open. The pool instantly turns from yellow to green and starts to bubble violently. Heal, heal, heal, I tell myself. Everything goes black. I see my body, I am floating upwards above it. My eyes and mouth are open and expressionless. My back is twisted like a question mark. "NOOOOO" I scream. Everything is black again. I hear voices, they are saying "I SAW HIM MOVE" then another voice says "Don't be ridiculous he is as dead as they come." Then the first voice again "I'M TELLING YOU I SAW HIM MOVE." All is quiet and black for a long while.

I open my eyes, every thing is black, but not quite as black as before. Some light is coming from the sides. Something is on top of me, and it is very cold. With my left arm I try and move this thing that is on top of me. I grab it, it is made of plastic. I remember the texture of the plastic as it has become semi-ridged from the cold temperature. It is a thin plastic yet it was not fragile. It was made of a dark plastic. They had laid some kind of body bag on top of me, to cover me. I push it aside with ease. I cannot move but I am looking up toward the sky. I remember it was a crystal clear night and the stars looked magnificent. Then I tried to move, I managed to roll over on to my left side. Then I put my right hand on the ground and tried to push my self up. AT THAT MOMENT I HEARD AND FELT EVERY BONE IN MY BACK AND BODY CRACK AND POP LIKE A CHIROPPRACTOR HAD JUST DONE A "TOTAL" BODY ADJUSTMENT ALL IN ONE SHOT. After the cracking and popping had stopped I paused for a moment in the position that I was in. That moment seemed to last forever, and it felt like a "cross roads" in my life. I remember thinking "GET UP! JUST GET UP YOU PIECE OF SHIT!. STAND UP!" and I stood up. I was all right, I was somehow all right, I have no idea how or why but I was all right.

I looked around, it was night.

I was in the middle of a field, just like the one I had jumped into before during the day. I am standing but my vision is very hazy. It is very difficult to make out objects. All to my right and up a slight incline is a group of men. All I can see is their shadows as they are standing in a circle and there is a lantern in the middle of them. I would estimate 10 to 15 men in all. I start walking towards the group. In the dark I pass two men walking away from the group. As I pass them I casually say "What's up" and they acknowledge me with a similar response. When I get to the group I stand about a foot and a half behind and in between two men. Like a curious kid I am sticking my head in trying to listen in. I see Adolph getting his ass chewed out by another man who I had never seen before. This guy was dressed implacably in a good suit and overcoat.

He is screaming at the man with Adolph "YOU CALL THIS A DEMONSTRATION! YOU DRAG ME OUT HERE TO WATCH YOU COMMIT MURDER ON A COLLEGE KID!. ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR F*CKING MIND?" and he was going on and on. Just at that point the man directly to my left looks at me. His face turns as white as a ghost. His mouth is open with a cigarette stuck to his lip. I am looking at him and I ask "What is going on?" He in turn hits the man to his left. The man to his left is ignoring him, so he hits him again. Finally he gets his attention and he turns to the man who is hitting him and says "WHAT" and the first man points to me. The second man sees me and his face turns as white as a ghost. The second man then yells to Adolph, and he repeats himself until he gets his attention. The second man then points to me. Adolph then turns as white as a ghost. By now every one is looking at me and all conversation has stopped. Everyone is looking at me so I turn around to see what they are looking at, but all I can see is darkness. So I turn around and say "What the f*ck is every body looking at?" The Adolph comes over to me and grabs the lantern on his way over. He spins me around to examine my back. He sees that I am all right and he asks me "What happened" and I say with all sincerity "I'LL TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED! SOME ASS-HOLE JUST PUSHED ME OUT OF A F*CKING PLANE." My tone then sobers and I say "I couldn't see the ground, and I wrecked, I almost didn't make it. At that point the two men who I had passed in the dark come back to the circle and start yelling "ALL RIGHT WHO HAS BEEN F*CKING AROUND WITH THE BODY." They then see me and their mouths drop wide open. Adolph tells me he wants to introduce me to someone. He brings me over to the well dressed man and like a proud father introduces me. The man was either a senator or a congressmen, I can't be for certain but I'm about 90% sure he was a Senator. I was introduced but I cannot remember his name. It's like on the tip of my tongue, but for the life of me I just can't remember his name. Anyway, he turns to Adolph and asks "Was this all part of the demonstration?" and Adolph shakes his head no. The Senator then said "If I didn't see it with my own eyes I wouldn't have believed it. NO F*CKING WAY!!!! JESUS CHRIST that was f*cking unbelievable!!!! I step in and interject and say "I know it's not my place but do you think we could get some of that night vision shit? I couldn't see the ground and it almost killed me!" and a chorus of nervous laughter erupts. The well dressed man puts his arm on my shoulder and says "Anything you need from me you f*cking got it." My guess is what just happened was they just got unlimited funding. An open check book, this is when things dramatically changed.

As we were packing up to leave, one of the men asks me "Rhino, what do you want? you name it and you got it." I say "OK.. I want an ice cream." He nervously starts to laugh "you want an ice cream?" he asks. "Yes, I want an ice cream", and he says "you f*cking got it". We get in the car and drive back to town, I know it was late because all the stores were closed. But by god he was going to get me my ice cream. He ends up by-passing the alarm and breaking into a "Baskin Robin's 31 flavors" ice cream store. And he says "what flavor do you want". I said "chocolate". He got pissed off at this because he could have gone to the local food store in stead of breaking in, but I said "thank you" and ate my ice cream, they took me home, and I went to bed.

The "Military" lab Now at the big lab is when things were different. This is when the military directly got involved and this is what happened.

First off, the big lab used to be a pretty barren place (it was a huge room inside some kind of facility). With a few things in there (the squat rack etc..). BUT NOW, there is all kinds of stuff, a huge water tank, this electronic punching square, and ALL kinds of electronic shock equipment. It was like a different place. It was full.

I'm standing there and I hear arguing going on. I see Mr. Green (the man in the army uniform), he is arguing with the man with the white hair (Adolph, the German Nazi). From what I could put together it was about who now had control of this project. The Mr. Green is saying that this is a "Military matter now" and Adolph is telling him to "GO F*CK HIMSELF", and that they just cannot come in here and push him out. What ended up happening I think was the Military "Officially" took over the project at that point, but as it turns out they needed Adolph because he was the only one who could control me as he was the one who had done the initial programming of me (I remember him as far back as age 5 when I lived in Munich with my family). He knew all of the trigger words, and how my mind was programmed. As a result of this the Military named him as "the director" of the project. So, he was involved and still had some power (or at least he thought he did).

Here is what happened, the Military brings in it's own group of lab doctors. They were a pack of 5 or 6 men (all men) all wearing these baby blue lab coats. The head instructor (it was a fair assumption to assume he was the head instructor by his mannerisms and attitude towards all the others) instructs me to "strip down to my underwear", I do not move. He yells it at me again "do it, NOW", again I don't move. He becomes very pissed off and starts ranting on and on about "what the f*ck is going on around here ..etc..etc.." Adolph comes over and tells me to "strip," and I immediately do it. This really pisses of the head lab coat man, and at the same time really pleases Adolph. As this not only keeps Adolph "in the loop" but it makes him a very intricate part of the project (the man in the blue lab coat tried several times to "undo" this part of my programming and the man with the white hair found out about it and almost killed him).

Anyway, this is what happened next. I remember stripping down to my underwear, and then I spoke. This shocked everyone because I never spoke unless spoken to. I said "I have to keep my pledge pin on me at all times, even in the shower, I must have it on the towel". I was very upset about this. I was pledging the fraternity Delta Kappa Epsilon and as a pledge you MUST ALWAYS have your pledge pin on. It was a triangle pin and the three sides were colored red, blue and gold. Again, the head man in the blue lab coat starts yelling at the man with the white hair and black leather coat "what kind of show are you running here, I thought you said he was thoroughly prepared etc..etc..". Meanwhile one of the other lab guys picks up my cloths and starts to walk away with them. He gets three or four steps away and like a tiger I pounce on him. I grab him by his throat with my right hand and rip my shirt away from him with my left.

All of a sudden 5 or 6 guys leap on the both of us and they pry his neck from my hand. The man with the white hair immediately jumps in and tells me to stand up and not to f*cking move. They start arguing again, all of a sudden one of the men with the white haired man from the original group from the back yells "HOLD IT" and he walks over, picks up my shirt, takes the pin off of my shirt and pins it on the elastic band of my underwear. "NOW ARE YOU HAPPY" he says to me. "NO" I say. Why he asks? "IT'S NOT RIGHT" I say. "WHAT'S WRONG" he asks. I look down to the pin on my hip, and I turn it so the gold side is flat on top. "THERE" I say. "WHAT WAS THAT?" He asks. "IT ALWAYS HAS TO BE SUNNY SIDE UP!" I answer. "Are you happy now" he asks. "I'M VERY HAPPY NOW" I answer, as a chorus of laughter erupts as I stood there and could not move.

They then had me perform some simple strength tests (squeezing things, the squat rack etc). That was my first visit to the lab with the military doctors there. I assumed all along that they were military "doctors" (and I use the term "doctor" very loosely because a "Doctor" of what these guys were I have no idea).

I could see out of the corner of my eye the conversations that were going on. From the tones and mannerisms I could tell that the head lab instructor was the man running the show, the expert in the field. Adolph turned out to be my "coach" if you will. But it was very apparent that the man in green was the authority in the room. He would sort of stand off to the side with Adolph all the time. But when something went wrong or he wanted something repeated, I could not see him, but I would hear his voice come from some where in the room. And when he spoke everyone reacted.

What this does for me however, is we can now date this event. I was a pledge in my fraternity, freshmen year from October of 1988 through February of 1989. So these events must have happened somewhere in that time frame!

As a lab rat
After that, when I entered the lab, the head man with the baby blue lab coat was the one I hated, I mean I wanted to kill this guy. He was about 5'-8" or 5'-9" with wavy brown hair, brown eyes, and thick brown rimed glasses. He had a medium build and seemed only focused on "the results". He didn't care how bad the pain was or if I died right there on the spot. I believe he was a Nazi scientist who did their work in the most basic and horrific concentration camp type fashion. All he cared about was the data. This guy was the most inhumanly cruel son of a bitch that I think ever walked the face of the earth. From the things that he did to me, the experiments that followed, the impression that I got was that he was so removed from any emotion or any pity within his work that he basically thought of me as nothing more than, literally, a piece of shit. With no more regard for my life then one would give to a lab rat.

"The Juice"
Now with the new head man the experiments seemed to have increased in their viciousness. Now it was back to the table where they would strap me down and began giving me the shock treatments again. They would hook me up with electrodes and give me "the juice". Giving me shock through my genitals, through a needle in my ear. They were on, in, and all over my body. The man in the blue lab coat instructed me to "to turn off" all of my nerve endings at the main junction box in the blue room in my mind. I remember looking at the ceiling and then this sort of tickling or numbing sensation comes over me. As it continues to increase I start to "switch". "Hold it back" I am saying to my self "hold it back!" until finally I just cannot and begin to start screaming as I am now violently shaking on the table. Everything is black for a while, but then is see my body. I am floating upward and I see my self with people all around me and they are trying to restart my heart. Then everything goes black again and I "flash" into the blue room in my mind. I am dragging myself toward the healing pool as I am hurt badly and I struggle over the short wall and "flop" into the pool. In my mind I close my eyes and submerge under the green bubbling water and just think "Heal yourself! Heal yourself!" When I open my eyes again I am back in the lab. Laying on my back on the table looking up at the ceiling again. I struggle to sit up and the lab is now empty and I fall back on my back again. I try and swing my legs over the edge I do and I fall off the table and hit the floor. I try to get up but my legs cannot support me and I fall to the floor again. "GET UP" I am saying to my self "GET UP!!! YOU F*CKING SON OF A BITCH, STAND UP AND WALK", it was like being hit in the head with a base ball bat when you are extremely drunk. The world is spinning, but somehow your instinct takes over and all you want to do is get away. I head for the door as fast as I can. Which turns out to be not very fast as I am trying to walk but cannot, it was more of a crawl. I make it to the door, and turn down the hall way, within moments they are all around me. Astonished that I'm first of all alive and secondly that I have moved at all, like I am even less than a lab rat, they stand around and start discussing me, as I'm trying to crawl with every ounce of strength I have. I am collapsed in a ball on the floor with my face stuck in the crack where the wall meets the floor. And as I hear them talking I cannot help my self and I start to cry uncontrollably "PLEASE! PLEASE! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE" I beg. And the bastard in the blue lab coat says "get him back in the lab now!" And they pick me up and bring me back, and strap me back onto the table. But I don't remember anything after that.

Another time they put me in a tank of water and sealed the top, to see if I could breath under water. The first few times I managed to escape before I drowned to death. But then they finally got a tank that I could not break and had a sealed top. I remember violently trying to get out but could not. I drowned and I black out, I see my body again, as I am floating above it again. This time they are pumping my chest trying to get the water out of my lungs. I see my face, my eyes and my mouth are open. And again I flash to the healing pool and flop myself in (at some point I don't know exactly when I had added a little "handicapped" ramp to the pool so I wouldn't have as much trouble when I had to enter the pool) but again when I opened my eyes I am looking at the ceiling again.

I would always try to get up and try to run down the hall and they would always tackle me before I could escape. The dimensions of how far I was actually going were very unclear. Very blurry and hazy around the edges. It seemed to take forever to get anywhere, and they seemed to move much faster than I could. But each time I got a little further down the hall and I was a little stronger when I came out of it.

I remember this happening several times. With both the water tank and the electroshock experiments. The dying and coming back to life. Just like with airplane to get the funding. Seeing my body and then automatically going right to the healing pool. And the healing pool would always somehow bring me back.

They were trying to see what I was capable of doing. They were obsessed with asking me if I could move object with my mind. If I could float in the air. If I could make objects float in the air. What they were trying to do was to place a suggestion in my subconscious and then see if I could do it. See if I really believed that I could do it. Like telling me that I could breath underwater and then locking me in a tank until I drowned and then revive me again. Telling me that I could fly, and then push me off a ledge. Things like that. Here is the limitation as to what I could do and what I couldn't do as best as I can figure out. You see I had already learned as a child that humans physically cannot breath under water, and humans physically cannot fly. I already knew this and it was embedded too far in my thought process to be removed. So even with their hypnosis and conditioning somewhere deep down inside me I knew that I could not do these things. So naturally I could not do them when they asked me to. However what they could do is "fool" my mind. Telling me things like I had an egg in my hand and to crush it when in reality it would be a tennis ball or a can of soda. Fooling my mind into thinking that everything I jumped off of was only as high as a footstool. Fooling my mind into believing that I could run as fast as a cheetah and be as agile as a gazelle. Fooling my mind into believing that when I shot a gun I was a computerized robot that shot with pin point accuracy.

It is more difficult for an adult to learn a foreign language than it is for a child because the adult mind is already "structured" in may ways. Adults already seem know the limits of their capabilities and potential, and most NEVER strive to be anything more that what the parameters of the society in which they belong to and have grow up in bind to them. Take for example inner city blacks, most truly believe that they will never escape the grasp of the ghetto, so most accept this as a fact and don't even try to escape through some other avenue. Such as trying to do well in high school and trying somehow to get into college, or by learning a trade or high paying skill, or by some other "legal" avenue. They simply enter into a gang where the odds of then being shot and killed is vastly higher that anywhere else. They do this because they TRULY BELIEVE this is their fate. If you ask the average 40 or 50 year old adult if they have achieved their goals in life and what they dreamed of becoming as a child, 95 percent would say "no". And then you ask them "why not?? What's stopping you?" Most would give some economic reason or they would say "I'm too old".. or "I missed my chance!" "WHY CAN'T YOU GO AFTER YOUR DREAM!.. WHO SAYS.. THAT YOU CANNOT DO IT! YOU ARE NEVER TOO OLD AND IT IS NEVER TOO LATE!" I say and I believe. Life all boil's down to fear, and whether or not you really have the courage to find out what you are really made of! That's why most adults find themselves in a job they really aren't happy with and yet they don't diverse into anything else, or they stay in an unhappy marriage for years and years. Why? Because of fear! The fear of being alone, fear of making changes, fear of taking risks, fear of failing. Earlier I had talked about how the coaches told me that I wasn't running as fast as the 40 times indicated, and after a while I started to believe them, and as a result I unconsciously slowed down. This is what I mean. By the time someone becomes an adult they have already stated to "slow down". Society has already set up the parameters of their fate, and they have mentally accepted it. But as children, none of these restrictive parameters apply. A young mind is like a damp sponge ready to absorb any information you drop on it. I had already absorbed the fact that I could not breath under water, and this fact could not be "undone", therefore when they put me in the tank and sealed the lid, I drowned. It would however be a very interesting experiment to see what would happen if you took a child as a baby and raised them in a world where they did not ever learn the "parameters" of this world. The restrictions and the laws of physics. How would they turn out? This is basically what they are doing, with the small oversight that they are doing it with the youth of America, WITH the written consent of the United States Military/Government.

After each shock episode when I regained consciousness, I would try to escape. Each time I would get a little farther down the hall, and after each time I seemed to be a little stronger. One time as men are grabbing me I threw a few of them off me and Adolph grabs me. I could not break his grasp, and we fell to the ground. As he is holding me he said "Rhino, it's me, your safe, Rhino I'm your father!" I specifically remember I said "Your not my father, my father lives in Connecticut and get your hands off me you f*cking asshole" and I spit right in his left eye. As we were struggling, someone stuck me in the ass with a syringe and I blacked out.

One time I remember waking up and now in the lab are several men. I get off the table and I am standing. They try and force me to the ground. "NO" I scream and all of a sudden it was like I had the strength of ten men. I threw those two to the ground and then three more grab me and I am wrestling with them three more grabbed me. Some around my waist some around my body and they are trying too get me to the ground. I am freaking out and fighting back with all my might. I would throw them off me like they were the size of 5 year olds but like ants they kept swarming on me and no matter how many I threw off more were always on me. There were at least six guys on me and they thought I was spent, but I had paused for that exact reason. Then in one burst I was driving with all my might towards the man in the blue lab coat. I got to only a few feet away when they wrestled me to the ground and stuck me in the ass again with the syringe. Just before they stuck me, and then after but before I blacked out again. I remember the men screaming "hurry up.. and just stick him anywhere". Then as the drugs disabled me to move I could still hear them for a minute or two. It was black but I could still hear then talking and one guy said "Jesus! that was like trying to wrestle a bull for Christ sake" and the other guy says "I don't know about a bull but how about a Rhino."

And they all began laughing at me. The next time, as I was coming to they stuck me within 5 seconds of me opening my eyes they stuck me with the needle but still I managed to over power three or for guys including throwing Mr. Green himself into the hallway wall. I got to the hallway and ran for the door. They tackled me about 20 yards from the door to the outside and then piled on me until they could administer another shot to me.

One time instead of trying to run down the hall I decided to hide instead. I managed to place a chair on top of the table and then knock the ceiling panel out of it's place. I managed to grab hold of the "I" beam and I pulled my self up and I wrapped my self around some of the supports. Everything was covered with about an inch of dust, but I didn't care, I held on in the filth with all I had. I heard the alarm go off and as they could not find me. Finally, after a long while and when they could not find me, they reviewed the video tape because the camera was always watching me. On the film they saw me climbing up into the ceiling and they came and got me. I began screaming "NO MORE! PLEASE NO MORE" and they hooked me back up to the electrodes and gave me more juice and more torture.

The next time I awoke there were six guys holding me down already and the needle was already in my arm. I freaked out like never before and again managed to get off the table and then the 10 man pile up commenced and they stuck me again.

Finally they got smart and after all their resuscitation efforts failed they would re-strap me to the table because they knew I would come back sooner or later. When I awoke and I had these "straps" on me and I was freaking out. All I remember is the bright ceiling lights and then shadows would come over me and I would black out again.

I don't know how many times this happened if it was all in the same night or if it was during different nights. As I became stronger and stronger, finally I ripped free of the straps. I didn't rip the thick leather straps themselves, I ripped them off from where they were connected to the table. Then when I had my left arm free I unbuckled my right and then undid my legs. I was off the table, the lab is empty except for that son of a bitch in the baby blue lab coat and his assistant. His back is turned to me and I walk very quietly over to him. I want to see the look on his face when he sees me free. I walk up behind him, and when the son of a bitch turns around and sees me all he says with no change in his facial expression is "What do you want?" I instantly grab him by his throat with my left hand and with my arm that is like a "Hydraulic vice" I crush his throat as easily and with as much effort as it takes to crush an empty beer can. Then I let him go. He flops around for a while like a fish out of water gasping for air holding his throat. With in seconds he stops moving. I turn to my right and look at the lab assistant. He sees me looking at him and drops his clipboard. The look of fear in his eyes is unforgettable. He has short brown hair, and brown eyes. He is about 5'-9" with a thin build. I start to walk over to him. He is backing up as far and as fast as he can go, when he reaches the wall he looks away from me as he is pressing his body as flat as it can go. He starts screaming "NO! PLEASE NO" and I grab him by the shirt. He passes out and I just drop him to the floor as I had nothing against him personally for he was just the assistant, and I let him live. I head for the door, and turn right into the hallway. I start running for the outer doors and I am about half way down the hallway when about six or seven guys leap out of no where from a connecting hallway and tackle me. I am wrestling with them, I throw some off and some more jump on the pile. They stick me with the needle again, and then again, and then again until I am subdued.

When I wake up I am standing in front of the body. The man with the white hair is yelling at me. I felt like a puppy who had just gone to the bathroom on the good rug for the first time. "WHAT IS THIS?" he yells. "WHAT DID YOU DO? LOOK AT WHAT YOU HAVE DONE!" As he was yelling at me I didn't feel bad about it, and I felt no shame. All I could think about was "Your next you piece of shit and if I could move I would kill you right here you f*cking ass-hole". They were controlling my body, but somehow inside my mind still tried to fight on. Even though I couldn't move my body "Andy" was still inside somewhere.

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